December re-cap

The end is nigh.  End of the year, anyways.  I hope everyone had a lovely holiday.   We really didn't do much as money is tight and family were unable to be with us. But it was a very nice Christmas and the first in our new house!

I thought I'd share some photos from the last few weeks.  I'll narrate here and there so it's not too terribly boring!Two rats are still with us. This might be it for small critters but I always say that, and then we get more. Anyways, they are fun to watch and play with. These two are super tame and love to be held and crawl all over you. The enjoy climbing into my cleavage and peeking out of my shirt. Scamps.



This is Ashley, albeit a bit blurry.



This is Samus and she is Ash's sister. They were enjoying some rat croissants. Yes, they are little croissant crackers for rats.



Here is my attempt at photographing Tobin in low light/Christmas tree lights. He won't sit still and you can't go near him without him trying to cover you in his saliva. He also has a whip-like tail and when he walks past the tree, he catches ornaments on his tail. Then he runs around the house, whipping everyone and everything with plastic ornaments. I tried to get pictures of that too but by the time I grab the camera, the ornament comes loose and launches through the air. It's very entertaining.



Normally this is what Tobin is doing, when he's not licking. Patton has taken to grabbing Tobin's neck and legs in his jaws. This inevitably leads to an ass kicking since Patton is half Tobin's size.





More common dog scenes in the house.







Horace, the big black lab/chow/retriever mix, came to spend the holidays with us. I got an email asking for a five day foster home and felt that we can handle one more just for a few days. Other than some mild dog aggression and marking a few spots in the house, he was pretty fun to have around. Since it was our first foster situation, we learned a lot. Horr'y is now at a prison in Missouri where he is being housed with and trained by an inmate. When he's done he is going to a retriever rescue in Colorado where he will hopefully find a new home soon. We might see Horr'y again when he comes back through on his way to CO. It was a rewarding experience but things got hectic at times. Luckily we have the fenced yard where everyone can go and I got some quiet time.



Christmas was good. Ron was happy to get some ham since I don't eat pork anymore. Here he is celebrating and coveting his pig meat. "Ron, come get some ham!!!"



This is normally what Sadie does while we cook.



We also exchanged gifts and Ron got me a topless pinup ornament. It's actually a nice, glass one. I had never heard of Pornaments before and thought it was pretty funny. Plus it fit in with all the pinup stuff I did all year.



I got Ron a Metalocolypse shirt to go with the first season on DVD.





It was also a good year for geek gifts. Ron got me a Bruce Campbell tshirt and a shirt and mug from blog of Hyperbole and a Half. (Thanks Andy for turning me onto that blog. I have laughed a lot while reading her posts!)

I also got Ron season 2 of Red vs Blue and Red Dead Redemption for the Xbox. We having played Red Dead yet but hopefully later today.



The last few weeks I've had an influx on orders through my Etsy site. I had a stroke of luck when someone received one of my pieces through her secret santa. She was so happy that she shared it on Reddit and I got orders from that. Thankfully due to those orders and some subversive ornaments I sold, I was able to order a low-priced sewing machine. Next up, geek pillows! (Once I figure out how to run a sewing machine.)

Annnnnnnnd I'm almost completely off my fibromyalgia medicine. I was supposed to get off it if I got pregnant. And well, that happened and we all know how that turned out. But since I had started tapering down, I thought I'd just keep going. I'm down to half a pill every other day. If I'm spaced out, crabby or in pain, that's why. I hope once I get used to not being on it again, things will even out. Right now I am having a hard time concentrating and have pain in my jaw, legs, back, etc. I have some pain meds but they make me dizzy and make concentrating even harder. I'll have to figure out if, after the withdrawal, I feel better or worse being on the pills. Trial and error I guess.

So LAST f'in thing and I'll quit typing. It's Sadie's birthday today! She's 14 years old. I have no idea how much longer she will keep going but she is such a big part of our lives. She's always been there for me during my first year away from home, a marriage, divorce, remarriage, all my surgeries and health woes, hiking camping, driving thousands of miles, moving to different states, etc. I hope she stays with us for as long as possible!



That's a lot to read and if you are still with me, thanks for going through this post. I suppose if I blog more often, there wouldn't be so much to post at one time. Anyways, have a lovely post holiday week!

Tschus!

Mish mash

Holy shit, long time no blog!  I'd like to say there is nothing new in my life but there is tons going on.  So here is an update:

First off:  We beat Bioshock 2 just in time for the March 11th expansion pack. I haven't planned any of the online portions of the game yet so I can't really say much about the multiplayer, online death matches.  However the story was good for a sequel and the graphics, though at first seemed grainy, turned out to be really awesome.  I thought the game was harder overall with more melee type attacks.  Playing it on easy gave you a lot of hints that seemed a little unnecessary but that's ok too.  I love the art deco themes and the characters are interesting.

Second:  Lasik went awesome!  I can see!  It was horribly uncomfortable and while they give you a lot of valium, that just wears right off when you are under the laser.  It was nice that my husband was allowed to sit in there with me and I clawed the shit out of his hand during the procedure.  But the awfulness lasted only about 20 minutes followed by a horrible ride home.  I took something to help me sleep and by the time I woke up 4 hours later, I felt worn out but fine.  I did have to wear some groovy blinders at night for a few days to keep me from scratching my eyes.



I had some lovely impressions in my flesh every morning.  But it turned out really well and I'm happy with it.  No more contacts or glasses.  Schweet.

I've been working pretty hard at my health shit.  I found some books at the Half Price Bookstore which talk about fibromyalgia and endometriosis.  I'm working on a symptom and food diary to try to pinpoint triggers.  During this time I've had a fever that came out of nowhere and am trying to figure out if there is any rhyme or reason to things like that.  So we'll see what comes of this new experiment.  I still would like to lose the rest of the 40lbs I gained.  That means I have another 15-20lbs to go.  Being overweight and chronically ill is not easy.  It just exacerbates all your shit.

No new pets and no pets have passed away, no matter how old and infirm they are.   I'm starting Patton on obedience classes this coming week.  I hope that when he gets over his fear of oh.....EVERYTHING....he will be able to start training for a therapy dog program.  Our vet seems to think he'd be excellent at it because of his very mellow temperament.  He went in today to get his distemper shot and a heart worm test. He's a very sweet dog and I think he'd be a great ambassador for his part Staffordshire Terrier breed.  So many Pit mixes like him are put down right away or taken from their homes in cities with breed bans.  We are learning a lot about this because of our involvement with a pit bull rescue.  This volunteer work has been very rewarding as well as educational.  Just to get it out there, I fucking hate the media.  I hate them all.  Their mission is to sell news by freaking the shit out of everyone in a community.  Period.  Misinformation be damned!  We have to sell newspapers, ratings, etc!  Fuck the truth!  Ok sorry, I'm off my soapbox for now.

Last couple of thing:  I'm going to take a pinup photography class next weekend.  I'm going by myself, which for a hermit, is a big deal.  I'm freaked out by social situations like this but I think it will be fun and informative.  I think the new pin up style with the tatts and vintage/rockabilly themes are awesome.  This all proceeds the Pinups for Pit Bulls event in KC on the 19th.  I'm all for animal rescue organizations, beer and music.  Now, what to wear?  No clue...  The last item of discussion is that I really want another tattoo.  I'm trying to find something that reminds me of my mother.  Yesterday was the 26th anniversary of her passing.  A long ass time ago.  I really miss her and would like my next tatt to be something to do with her. Ron is pretty ready for more ink so we're going to investigate some new tattoo parlors.   And finally, I hope to hit up the roller derby around the end of the month.  It's going to be a girls night comprised of women I work with.  I think we're going to get a little drunk and watch some chicks on roller skates beat the crap out of each other.  That should be fun!

I'll update my blog with another stitch or two when the time is right.  I've got some ideas on the burner for new embroidery and I'm excited to get started.  So overall things are good but everyday is a learning experience.  Some times I fuck up royally and other days I have things in control.  I can't seem to predict from one day to the next how it's going to go.  Just doing the best I can!

Tschus.

Catsup…or….catch-up

I've been trying to blog for a few days but not a lot is coming to me.  It's like everything: I have a lot I want to do, and little energy and motivation to do it.  Cooking, cleaning, stitching, photography, etc.

So here is a general catch-up.

A few weeks ago I brought home a sick rat from the nature center and nursed her back to reasonable health.  I got attached to the damn thing and was going to keep her, but as rats are social creatures, knew I had to get her a cage mate.  So I got her a cage mate and she tried to kill it.  So we picked up the litter mate for the new one and took the nursed one back to work.  I feel horrible but in the end it all worked out.  The now-healthier one is back with her old cage mate and the new one I got has her sister with her.  So now, not really meaning to, I have two new rats.  They are baby Dumbo rats, with the huge ears.  Very cute.  But the house is a step away from officially becoming a petting zoo.  I either need to have a kid or have my uterus removed.



Ash the rat



Samus

At work this week there was another round of layoffs.  That was tough.  I am safe because of how our department is funded but that doesn't isolate me or my coworkers from the stress around us or the extra work we all have.  So it sucks, but life goes on.  I've been thinking of taking some classes in criminal justice to open up other areas where I can work.  Whether or not this is actually going to help me, I have yet to figure out.  But I'm exploring my options and maybe I can do records work in a court house or police station someday.

Ron and I are fighting over using the XBox.  A lot of good games came out in the last few weeks.  We picked up Mass Effect 2, Bioshock 2 and Dante's Inferno.  If we didn't have to leave the house for food or work, we'd barricade ourselves inside.  We did manage to get to the gym today and I am about to start cleaning up the house a little....so we aren't too bad off.  If we stop bathing and start defecating in diapers, call social services.



Mass Effect 2 (Ron's game)



Bioshock 2 (very sweet)



Dante's Inferno (very visually appealing and gross)

Other than that, I'm worried about my ex's daughter.  She's at a very vulnerable age and is having normal teenage issues on top of other issues.  It's a recipe for disaster and I'm not sure her parents are aware of how serious it is.  I'm pretty pissed off about it to be honest but don't want to type too much about it publicly.  All I can do is spend time with her when I can and be an ear for her.  I expect I'll see her next weekend if my eyeball surgery on Friday goes well.

That leads me to my eyeballs.  I've been wearing my glasses for a couple months because I've been going through pre-screening and screening for Lasik.  My surgery is the 19th and I'm pretty excited but a little freaked out too.  I guess it takes just minutes so at least it is quick.  What is a little unnerving is having just finished reading A Clockwork Orange, having my eye lids pried open does not appeal to me.





Here's to hoping they don't inundate my brain with some kind of programming.  Unless it's "This Will Make You Wealthy" programming.

That's about all I can think of right now.  Aren't I exciting???

A sphincter says what?

Rowdy seems ok today.  He still won't eat much and I'm not sure if he's pooping either.  A healthy dump is a sign of good things so that's what I'm looking for.  At this point we'd be fine even if he did it in the house.  I'll talk to the vet tomorrow and see if we need to come in for an exam.  Hopefully he will be ok.  I hate crying and feel like I've done enough lately.  Crying really doesn't help a sinus infection either.

We spent a good deal of last night cooking and drinking and playing Beatles Rock Band.  Thankfully Ron doesn't mind my attempt at singing.  He's good at the guitar part and I can at least hit most of the pitches so it was fun.  I grew up on The Beatles but I just never realized how fucked up the lyrics got towards the late '60's.  You don't really appreciate how drugged up they were until you try to sing the lyrics.  Fun stuff.



The graphics are good too because there is a lot of detail given to their instruments.  They also really nailed the various looks that the band went through over the years.

Video games are a great distraction as well as a nice stress relief.  Unless you are playing Mario on the Wii.  We still can't get past that last castle.  Fucking Bowser.  I can't imagine trying to play with more then two people at once.

So it's a new year and for some reason people are sometimes compelled to make resolutions or reevaluate life.  I'm not so silly as to think just because we started this year off with a canine crisis that my whole year is destined to be shitty.  Quite honestly last year was really hard and not that great overall, but we got through it without taking things out on each other.  Ron's been absolutely supportive and wonderful through all the ups and downs.  No matter how shitty it all gets, he is always the one constant and happy thing in my life.

I have come to some conclusions though; some lessons learned.  I'm going to stop trying to explain to people what the hell is wrong with me and why I can't do everything they ask of me.  I can't make someone understand and I'm no longer going to try.  I just don't give a crap anymore what they think or don't understand.  It's too much energy.  This blog is my main vent and it's free so I'll just put it all here.  Lucky you!!!!  (I do promise, however, that not all blogs will be a bitch-fest.  There is more to life out there, somewhere.)

I've also concluded that I can't sit and feel sorry for myself unless I know I've tried everything to help myself.  So I've looked into my conditions a bit more and most people agree that dietary changes can help with some symptoms.  I can add more veggies and fruit and organic animal products to my life.  But I'll have to limit fun things like fried foods, sweets and alcohol.  Boo, hiss.  Meh.  I'm going to stay out of smokey places as much as possible as well.  I'm also going back to swimming and water therapy because if I do it 2-3 times a week, I'm going to at least have some physical stress relief.  It's finding that balance between doing too much and too little that is so damn tricky.  Plus, there is a hot tub there I can use.  You just don't know what fun is until you've sat in a hot tub with a bunch of old people at the community center.  Hawt.   Me and my tattoos... and lots of old people.  Just picture that in your mind for a second...  And when I've figured out the pattern to follow for that, I'll try yoga.  Why not?  If it was horrible for you, would it be so popular?  Don't answer that.  The thought of colonics just popped in my mind.  (Seriously people, you don't have years worth of shit built up in your guts.  You just don't.)  And finally, I need to rid myself of one of my stressors and that is my job.  I love what I do but, well I can't get into it much here.  Something in my career life needs to change for the better.

I leave you with an image I found doing one of my Google image searches.  It just makes me giggle....a lot.   Enjoy.

Tschus.

Post-Christmas cleanse

I should be trying to eat better and clean out my system after pigging out so much over Christmas.  We didn't do a damn thing but eat and play video games.  I got my wish for a white Christmas and we were snowed in.  So far the roads are pretty passable which is good when one must make it to work.  I'd rather be snowed in at home though.  The dogs liked their snow time and it was very beautiful outside.  I'm ready for the weekend already though as I've been fighting a lovely sinus infection and finally succumbed to antibiotics.  They are kicking my ass.

Here are some photos from our Christmas.  Nothing terribly exciting but at least it was peaceful.



The drainage ditch behind the house.  I cropped out the rotted mattress someone threw down there about a year and a half ago.



We didn't exactly primp for our photo shoot but dammit we still look cute.



Sadie enjoyed playing catch with the snowballs.



Ron has quite the smart ass sense of humor.  Good thing Rowdy was protected on the other side of the glass.



Here is Rowdy taking a nap the other day.  He's so old and losing weight.  Not because of anything in particular but because he hates his bland diet.  So tonight he had boiled rice and cooked ground beef.  Lucky guy, eh?



This is typically what Patton looks like when I wake up on the weekends.  We sleep in together.  And nap together.  He curls up in a little brindle ball and snoozes on the bed.



Final dog photo for the day.  Last Monday was Sadie's 13th birthday.  My baby is a teenager now.

So other then snow and pets, we've been playing a lot of video games.  We are almost done with Mario on the Wii.  The final Bowser section SUCKS.  This game was a lot harder then any other Mario games I've played.  I think it's mostly because trying to coordinate on a platform game with someone else playing is not easy.  Both of us try to jump in the same spot at the same time.  There is much cursing in this game.

We also made it through one run of Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles.  I like how they brought elements from several other RE games.  It was pretty fun and the shaky camera made head shots harder yet more enjoyable.  I would like to run through it again at a harder setting.

Finally, we made it through Left 4 Dead 2 which was a lot more fun then the first one.  The ai's were annoying as shit but the weapons were better and the levels were a little longer.  I especially like the melee weapons which included a frying pan, guitar and chainsaw.

So I don't have a lot more to share.  Well, someone asked me to photograph her in a tasteful, nude shoot.  That was unexpected.  I don't mind doing it though as nudity really doesn't bother me that much as long as I'm the one behind the camera.  I definitely need more lessons with the camera though and I think my peeps in the local KC Flickr group are going to be a big help.  Gotta love networking with others through the net.  It's been a life saver for me with all my social phobias and tendencies to hole myself up in my house 24-7.  Hey who knows.  Maybe I'll get a side biz taking nudies of people.  Wouldn't that be interesting?  "Not now junior, mommy has to take photographs of people's junk."  That would rock.

Be well dear friends.

Tschus.

Things to do to pass (waste) time

We hit the jackpot this weekend at Game Co.  It's like Game Stop only more vintage, and they pay a lot more for your games.  We got a nice credit with them and picked up several used games.  I was pretty geeked to find two Evil Dead games on XBox:



I haven't played A Fistful of Boomstick yet but I did play Regeneration for over an hour today.  It is HILARIOUS.  Ted Raimi does the voice of your midget Deadite sidekick and Bruce does Ash's voice, of course.  There are a lot of catchy one-liners and general hilarity.  The best part?  You can lock on your enemies and punt the Deadite to attack them.  I love it!    Since having an XBox is relatively new to me, I didn't pay much attention to these games before.  I now have all the ED games but not all the games with Bruce's voice.  Which is ok, as I'm not sure how much of a geek I want to allow myself to be.  Here is a link to the games: http://www.bruce-campbell.com/group.asp?grp=49

Crap, I just noticed this as well: http://www.bruce-campbell.com/pilot.asp?pg=action_figure It's a BC action figure.  Crap....$60?  I may be a geek,  but I'm a cheap geek.  Damn.

The other thing I did this weekend was finish up a book called Shadow of the Wind.  It is one of the best novels I have read since The Historian.  The author, Carlos Ruiz Zafón, writes very descriptively.  The setting is 1940's and 1950's Barcelona, set in the aftermath of Spain's civil war.  It's a mystery and very well woven.  I'm sure I could have figured out some of the twists and turns if I had let myself think about it, but I really enjoy just letting a story take me along.  I can't write a good review on it but you can find some great reviews on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Shadow-Wind-Carlos-Ruiz-Zafon/dp/1594200106  Apparently The Angel's Game is a prequel that just came out in English only a year ago.  I'll have to grab that up soon.



Long story short, read it.  I was dubious at first but I went from summer beach reading to this book.  You have to get your brain in the right mode to really let the story suck you in.   If you read it, let me know what you think!  I should really join a book club but am too damn lazy.

I also finished another cross stitch but will have to wait to unveil it until after I send it.  I made it for a swap for a photo group I participate in on Flickr called Phat Quarter.  After the recipient receives the piece, I'll post photos of it.  It's actually very lovely if I do say so myself!  I also finished an embroidery not long ago that is for a breast cancer awareness challenge on Craftster.  It's another photograph-to-embroidery piece:



This photo has over 12,000 hit on Flickr, but that's probably only because my boobs are partially showing.  I hate that pervs are looking at it but the photo has done some good.  I've had some people contact me to ask about the reconstructive part of mastectomies.  I personally feel better having talked to someone who has gone through this shit before me, no matter what it is.  So I keep the damn picture up for others to find, in case anyone else has questions.  The contest on Craftster starts in a couple weeks and I'm eager to sumbit this.

Rowdy is shrieking/whining for his supper so I better go.  Dogs do not like to wait for their supper!  Tschus!

Unwinding with nostalgia: The Legend of Zelda

I spent most of yesterday feeling like hell but I made it through the work day.  I talked to a nurse at the rheumatologist's office and she told me they have no idea how to get me off Cymbalta if the taper dose I'm on isn't working.  Go back to the general physician or detox through a psychiatrist.  Wow.  Talk about passing the buck.  I'm a fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis patient and even though she didn't initially prescribe this to me, I thought she would at least try to help.  The problem with going back to the GP is that I've had to educate her on this drug.  My last hope before going to a head doctor is to see if a nuerologist will see me.  I'm so angry that doctors put people on this shit with no idea about side effects and withdrawal symptoms, especially since this was supposed to be a temporary treatment.  I was so mad about this, I actually called a couple law offices.  That got me absolutely no where though.



I needed to unwind last night so I could relax.  Ron and I turned on the Wii and played a little Legend of Zelda.  That was my first game ever on the NES.  I loved that game.  The damn thing scrambled on me before I could get the last piece of the Tri-force.  I was so pissed!  What else is a little emo kid to do?  I figured I should try to beat the game finally.



I can't believe how much I remember!  I remember where most of the underworlds are and how to find the secret rooms.  We played until we made it through four or five levels.  Maybe Ron and I are just easily amused but it was fun!  Hell, I'm just happy when I can successfully blow off a bad day.

I guess we better get off our lazy butts and run some errands.  Woooooooo....have a good weekend!

Too much to do, so little motivation

Things I could be doing now:

Working out at the gym

Going to see the civil war re-enactors at Shoal Creek

Trimming my nose hair

Making up 5 hours of work by doing data entry at home

Working on my book

Cleaning house

What I'm doing instead:  Sitting in my pajamas, seeing wtf is up with this Twitter thing, watching Ron play Mass Effect and drinking coffee.  Oh and I'm feeling guilty about not doing any of the above.  Especially the nose hair thing because it has reached the extreme tickle phase.

I created a Twitter account to see what the hype is about.  My Twitter is http://twitter.com/nodakbex, by the way.  I'm not too impressed.  I'm not sure what the point of it is.  So I go on here to update everyone on what I'm doing RIGHT NOW and then I read all about what everyone else is doing RIGHT NOW and that's it?  The only thing I kinda like is that I can instantly put up a photo from my phone if I want to.  Well, as "instant" as I can get with a slow-ass Sprint connection from my weak phone.  I'll give that a shot and if I'm still not impressed, I can delete the account.  I have to say Brent Spiner's Twitter updates are amusing and odd.

Ok now that I see all this in writing, I'm somewhat motivated to eat breakfast and get to the gym.  Then maybe I can make myself take the camera up to Shoal Creek.  I should really try to get my ass out of the house more or my photographs will never be interesting.   Have a good day!

Der Lenz ist da

Spring has sprung!  So the Deutcher say.  Ron went with me to my doctor today.  We stared at a model of a uterus for a good 15 minutes, discussing various alien-like attributes and then my doctor came in.  He said the septum doesn't look too bad but it's there and he can resect it.  I'm scheduled to go in on April 24 with all the pre-op stuff on the 23rd.  Ma Burley is coming and I'm really happy about that.  It will be great to have her here again.  She is bringing her doggies with too.  They are having training issues (poop + pee + carpet) so we will try to help out with that.  We should probably rent a steam cleaner anyways.

So more meds to help me prepare for the surgery and these drugs also make you gain weight.  Hurrah!  More weight gain!  Hahahaa poop.  I picked out a bunch of new healthy recipes to try and made one for tonight.  It was great except I cooked the potatoes way too long.  So it was a very tasty mush.  I was going to take a photograph of my fabulous dinner but it looked like someone shat his pance.  Like I said, very tasty though.

I am doing a Flickr Group Roulette every once in a while now.  Basically one member of the group chooses an interesting and underused group on Flickr.  Today was Geeks and Nerds.  Then you try to compose a shot based on the theme and rules of that group.  Today was pretty damn easy since I can't help but be a geek/nerd.  I put on my zombie t-shirt (Brains, It's What's For Dinner) and fired up Left 4 Dead.  My whole purpose in doing the Roulette is to be challenged to take more than photos of animals.  I won't be able to do them everyday but a couple a week would be great.  So here is today's photo:



Sadie tried to help out with some shots but all she really did was lick the inside of my nose:



Oooh!  Chuck is on.  Gotta run!