Time for a happy break-GIVEAWAY!

I think I need a break from some of the sadness - don't we all?

In just one week we will find out the sex of our baby. We are so excited, it's insane. We don't care what it is, but just want it healthy and happy! (Pssst we kind of want a boy.) So to have a little fun in the remaining week of guessing, I thought I'd do a fun giveaway.

Up for grabs is one Laugh My Ass Off bookmark.



Here are the rules:

1. Visit our baby site and scroll down to the poll box. Vote "Boy" or "Girl."

2. Click on the Guestbook link and sign your name. I don't care if you only put your first name and last initial but you must leave me a valid email address.

Winner will be chosen at random after we find out the sex next week. Now, I hear sometimes the baby won't cooperate but we're going to plan on this baby lettin' it all hang out!

Please cross-post and thanks for having a little fun with me!!

Sweet Sadie Doo, Part 2

It's been a few days now and the crying fits are getting better. We still miss her and her absence has left quite a hole in the entire household. But there is comfort knowing she is no longer in pain. There has been a shift in the pack mentality, mainly seen between the two young, large dogs. I think her presence, especially during feeding times, kept some kind of order. But we are confident that things will even out soon.

I have always felt that nothing happens without a reason. Sadie Doo came to me at the beginning of a very tumultuous time in my life. I had just moved out, had a hard time making friends, was in a crappy relationship (one of many) and suffered from major depression. I had a lot of suicidal feelings that first year and other than one attempt, never tried to do it because I was worried about what would happen to her. She was also my security blanket. I never went anywhere without her, even small trips to the store for food. It got to the point where if she saw an open suitcase, she would sit inside of it because she was determined not to be left behind.

Later in life, she moved with me as I moved in with a man and his daughter, and later married this man. The relationship had it's ups and downs and then more frequently it was down. When I left him, Sadie jumped into the moving van, riding shotgun, the whole way to Kansas. I had to put her on puppy prozac because my one week absence (I was away to figure things out and make arrangements)gave her severe anxiety. During this marriage she was there for me while I went through my cancer scares and mastectomy, college, graduate school, several trips home back to ND and other fun trips. But it was during the dissolution of the marriage that her presence was the most comforting.



For our family holiday photo in 2006.



Always one to give kisses.



We continued our tradition of visiting parks.





She was my workout buddy and even in a cold December, we were out walking.



Our pack grew and she wasn't always happy about that. But there were moments when something like a pile of feathers united them all. Unfortunately these other dogs, my other babies, weren't so lucky. They stayed with my ex and through either neglect or deliberate and vicious acts, died not long after I moved.



Christmas was always her favorite time as she always got her own presents and enjoyed unwrapping them. She also unwrapped everyone else's presents.







Winter was her favorite season. She made the snow more fun.

When we moved, life changed dramatically. All the tension, stress and fear left us both and we were finally able to rest.



Relaxing





Lots of cuddle time



After a walk in the rain. We still have this toy but it stopped making elephant noises.



Once in a while, Ron's ex's dogs stayed with us.



I had a second chance at life, at happiness. I cherished every day, especially during that first year in my "new life." And Sadie was there for every step. Here she gets to clean out the empty peanut butter jar.



We spent a lot of time thinking, working through things.





She loved Ron. He was calm, happy and loving to her, as well as to me. Her behavior became more mellow during this time.



And then Patton came! This was taken just days after his adoption, right after we recaptured them after they chased a small herd of deer outside the townhouse. Patton was the only dog she didn't growl and lunge at. His calm temperament further mellowed her out.



Buddies



We moved that year and soon after the start of all my health diagnoses started.





Shortly after my first endometriosis surgery, these two kept my spirits up.



She loved the water and took to this boat right away. She jumped right in!



I'm posting this because this is the spot in our house where Ron proposed to me, and Sadie and Patton were all over him while he was on his knee. I'll never forget that.



Here she is, defending herself after I found a wounded stuffed animal. It really was Patton who did it, but I thought for sure she was guilty at first.



Ack! Caterpillar!




Face wash.







And that takes us up through 2007.

I think I'll end Part 2 here. I just got the call that her ashes are back. *sigh* Thanks again for all the comments and good thoughts.

Sweet Sadie Doo, Part 1

I have dreaded this day, ever since I got my sweet puppy, on February 18, 1997. She's been in pain for a little over two weeks, with what seemed to be just a torn ligament in her knee. However it became clear to us that it was much more when the pain pills and anti-inflammatories were not helping her to heal. Today I carried my best friend, my baby to the car along with Patton and picked up Ron to make her last trip to the vet. We had to go in a few hours early because even heavily medicated, she was in too much pain.

I could no longer bear to see her suffer and promised to take away her pain as my last gift to her.

We laid her on the table and the vet prepped her. She kissed some of my tears and sat patiently. I could not bear to watch but instead talked to her and held her. Soon I felt her head lay heavily in my arms and the vet said, "She's gone."

Our vet helped us get her paw print and then left us to say goodbye. We let Patton see her body but I don't think he understood really what was happening. It was good for him to be there as he kept her calm on the car ride there and helped me to cope. Patton was the first and only dog that Sadie really tolerated. She let him lay down next to her, and just generally infiltrate her personal bubble.

I dug up a ton of photos of her, seeing how I got her before digital cameras were invented. Thinking and seeing her in her active years helps to reinforce that I did the right thing. She loved to go where ever I went, she loved car rides, hated being alone and was always on the go. Lately she could barely get outside to go potty and that was bad enough. The addition of her pain made it all the more unbearable for all of us.

So today I'm sharing a ton of photos of her when she was young, happy, obnoxious, demanding, insolent, beautiful, energetic, and fun. In total, we lived at eleven different apartments/homes and four states. I put "Part 1" on this post because we had 14.5 long, wonderful years together. And part of grieving is going to be writing and remembering so there you have it. If you bother to see it through to the end of this post, then I thank you. I know Sadie Doo is in heaven with God, my mother, Rowdy, the rats and all the other dogs who have preceded her. I don't think she's at a Rainbow Bridge, waiting for me. No, she's already there. And someday we'll all be together-a motley crew of rodents, dogs and people. May God take good care of her until that day.



She is the only dog I've had the pleasure to know since she was a pup. One day, this little dog's ears unfolded into giant triangles framing her tiny head.















She saw her first horse when just a pup.







What else does a single girl do for fun? That's right, get a cheesy photo done with her dog.









There were a lot of photos like this.



And like this, which were post slobber.



At the giant bison in Jamestown, ND.





We went a lot of places together, at first in a small Honda Prelude where she would prop herself up on the back of my seat to stick her head out of the sun roof.



We also lived in some shitty places, as that is about all you can get on a college student's "salary" when you have a dog.



She spent a lot of time watching squirrels from here.



Hoarding bones on the couch.



Crashing a Subway restaurant after a night of partying.



Enjoying our brief stint of farm life in Minnesota.



In all kinds of weather, we went out exploring. Here on an abandoned farm in Minnesota.



She was always great about willingly getting into a bathtub.



But she preferred lakes, streams and creeks.



If there was a body of water nearby, this is what she looked like.



We always went to parks.



I was never a great housekeeper then but she didn't mind.



Sometimes she got dressed up for holidays.



She hated cats. This relationship did not last long.



And this is how I picture her now, in heaven surrounded by wide open spaces, lots of things to smell, water nearby and peace. The Sadie she was of late was not the happy, active, jumping dog she was when young. I miss her terribly but we will be together again some day. Until then, be free pumpkin butt, enjoy some burgers and fries, run without pain and weariness and know that you are still loved and remembered.

I love you Sadie Doo.